Tuesday, March 11, 2008

I CONFESS TO THE MORTAL SIN OF MAKING UP MORTAL SINS

I never realised before that the Roman Catholic Church can come up with new ‘mortal sins’ as and when it pleases. And each carries with it the punishment of hellfire and damnation in the 'afterlife' – unless the sin is confessed to a priest and absolved.

The latest batch published by the Vatican includes genetic experimentation, pollution, social injustice, drug abuse, and excessive wealth.

Excessive wealth! What a flaming cheek. The Roman Catholic Church is one of the richest organisations on this earth. It built up a vast fortune in the Middle Ages by ‘selling’ places in heaven to rich families – and by milking the poor of every last penny with promises of God’s eternal blessing.

Presumably this is just a 21st century way of offering the excessively wealth a safe haven for their dosh – the Church, of course. Join the poor in heaven!

If the Papists can be so blatant, so can I. I suggest the following be made mortal sins:

• Making outrageous promises that can’t be validated (that’s putting it politely)
• Scarring the psyche of little children by telling them they are very likely to burn in hell for any one of myriad misdemeanors (in any other context this would be called child abuse)
• Pretending to be the messiah who can save England’s rugby, football, or cricket team from eternal condemnation.

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