Excuse me, ladies, I’m going to be terribly sexist today. I happened to mention ‘norks’ the other day, and it rather threw an old friend of mine, who had never heard the word.
The preceding two words – Page Three – were a bit of a giveaway, so he had twigged the meaning before he asked his Mum, which is just as well. He is 55.
For those few who still don’t know, norks are female breasts. The word is Australian slang derived from – and this is a beaut – the prominent udders on a cow used to advertise Norco, the New South Wales North Coast Dairy Co-operative.
It set me wondering why men have so many different words for breasts, other than the ubiquitous tits. Just check them out: jugs, baps, boobs, puppies, knockers, fun bags, melons, hooters, bazookas – and so on. I could go on but I might go blind.
I did a little research, which ground to a halt when I stumbled across Britain’s biggest bra photoshoot. The Iris advertising group is looking for 1,000 women, of whatever shape or size, to take part in a new Wonderbra marketing campaign.
A spokeswoman, harking back to the famous picture of Eva Shirtoff – sorry Eva Herzigova – in the 'Hello Boys' advert 10 years ago (pictured above), said: “Advertising has changed. Today it is not about talking at your market – it is about involving them in the creation of the marketing. We have created a campaign that culminates in the biggest collection of cleavages in Britain.”
Voiunteers are being asked to audition on June 28 (see the Wonderbra website).
My tip is: don’t go anywhere near No 1 Leicester Square, London, on that day. You’ll be killed in the rush.
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