NO GAS? NEVER MIND – WE'VE GOT CASH TO BURN!

As all the power companies bleated to a House of Commons committee yesterday that they had no option but to send prices soaring again – despite their vast profits and vast executive salaries – a leaflet dropped on the mat of my mate Eddie.

It was from British Gas. It asked: ‘Can you afford not to have your boiler checked?’ and offered a HomeCare repair scheme in the event of a breakdown of his gas boiler.

The thing is – Eddie’s village has no gas. Neither have those on either side. Most houses have oil-fired boilers, a different beast altogether. I would bet my bottom dollar, or the top one come to that, that every house in every gas-less village in the UK, and there are many thousands, will be receiving the same leaflet. Four pages of A4 with glossy printing – no cheap flyer.

It is unfair of me to pick on British Gas – all the energy companies are fucking useless.

Yesterday’s House of Commons debacle, in which the Fat Cat bosses showed no shame at all, summed up all that was, and is, wrong with privatising utility companies.

In the days of the old proper British Gas, the vast £1.2billion post-tax profit made by the current crap British Gas could have been used to help peg recent price increases to acceptable levels.

Now it goes to shareholders and shameless Fat Cats. The Obese Ones claim much of it goes on investment in new sources of energy. And some of it undoubtedly does. But the same argument holds. The bit that doesn’t could have come back to the consumer.

Then we’d all feel a nice warm glow.